Friday, September 30, 2005

Farewell! :)

Well it is time to bid you all farewell. At least for the next 8 days. I am leaving in the morning for my trip with my dad. Just got the final things packed. I will not be back until Oct. 9th. My wife can not wait till I leave. She says that she will be able to sleep much better without me here snoring. I guess I need to give my CPAP machine another try when I return. I'm so excited to leave and be alone in the wilderness. We will be hunting about 1.5 hours away from civilization on the Oregon border. The only down side is the 13 hour drive there. That and I don't know if I can go 8 days without checking email and my online reading. See you in 8 days!

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Unsolicited advice

Digger made a few comments on his site about my financial situation. Just thought I'd share my response to him. It may help somone. Here is the original post from

  • Digger on debt
  • and here is my response

    Wow you said a lot there. You pretty much have it right about what we are doing. Here's the whole plan.
    My parents own the house we are buying. We have been living in it for 5 years. The house appraises for 389k. We are buying it for 270k. My parents are taking 100k for themselves. That is the price we are buying it from my parents for. Because we are buying the houde with 120k in equity my wife and I are getting 25k back at the close of escrow. We are using that money to pay off our credit card, my student loan, and my wifes Exploder. We will have approx. 3k left over. We were going to use that to do some needed repairs to the house. Now we are going to use that left over cash to repair the Exploder and hope that it lasts us another 2 years. Then we will probably be buying a coworkers mini van to use as a backup incase the Exploder explodes.
    Now the reason we are paying all these things off with the equity in the house is because we can not afford the payments if we still have those bills. It really has nothing to do with taxes.
    Now for the details of how we are buying the house. Just incase someone out there is in the same situation. We will be actully refinancing the house. My parents are refinancing the house and putting my wife and I on the deed. In a year from now we will refinance again and take my parents off the deed. Then to keep from paying a huge gift tax on the house for my wife and my parts, and on my parents part for the 100k, we will fill out a special tax form that says that the house will be coming off of my inheritance. Therefore making it taxfree. We are getting a portion of my inheritance before my parents die. This info came from a tax person in S.F. EACH parent can give EACH child a tax free inheritance of 3 mil. The house will just come off of my 3mil.
    To me this seems to be the best way to do this given our financial situation. Untill the Governator decides to give state workers their first cost of living raise in over 9 years.

    If you can't tell I'm in no way a fan Arnold. Can't stand him. He's trying to cut my wages and give state workers 5 days off per year UNPAID! Fuck you governator!

    Wednesday, September 28, 2005

    And it's a new day

    So after I was done posting last night I gave my wife a hot bath. Lit some candles, and let her soak for awhile. While she was soaking I put a towel in the dryer to heat it up. I went back to the bathroom and washed my wife off and let her soak more while I got the towel from the garage. I dried her off and laid her in bed and gave her a back massage. She was so emotionally drained from the day. We both were. So we went to sleep just holding each other. I love moments like that.
    So today I was at work and a guy I work with says his kid that is getting divorced is selling a mini van for 1500. Talked to my wife about it and she got mad at me because 1) its a Ford and she hates Ford (her uncle retired from Chevy, mine retired from Ford.) & 2) she hates mini vans. Again I told her we are not in a position to be picky. She started yelling at me so I hung up on her. I sent her a text to call me when she's wants to talk not yell. She called back 5 minutes later and she still was not happy but at least she was not yelling. Side note here for years I have yelled at her for things like she is yelling at me for. I'm trying to get to a point now where we can talk to each other without turning things into a yelling and pissing match. God I hate the things I've done to her in the past. So when I came home after work she was singing a different tune. She said that she would be willing to look at the mini van because of what a friend told her. Her friend said she had a dream 2 months ago that my wife would be driving a mini van soon. Not that I believe in that sort of thing but it made my wife happy about at least looking at it so I'll go for it.
    It's not like I am going to buy the van anyways. I'm just going to look at it. I'm thinking now that I might fix the Explorer for the 1500, and hope we can make it last for the next 18 months or so till we can be picky about what we drive. Also if we have money left over buy the mini van to keep as a back up vehicle if something happens to the Eploder.
    I just hope that I'm making the right decision to fix this car instead of get rid of it. I don't like the idea of paying it off for 6000 then trade it in for 2500 or less. Thats just to much of a loss. Though its not like we haven't already lost enough money to this P.O.S. I can't wait for Sat. morning to go on vacation.

    Tuesday, September 27, 2005

    The shit keeps piling up

    Be forewarned that I am very pissed at the moment so there will be an overabundance of "F" bombs in this post. If this type of language offends you I'll pretend to be sorry. But right now I'm in to bad of a mood to give a Fuck!!!!!

    So this turned out to be a really fucked up day. When I changed the oil in my wifes Explorer on Sun. I noticed antifreeze all over the underside of the engine. I thought well ok, it's probably just a worn out freeze plug. So I had my wife take her truck to the shop this morning. She calls me up crying so bad that I can barely understand what she is saying. It turns out that what I thought was a minor problem turned into a major fucking money dump. It has a blown head gasket, a hole in the radiator, and a pinhole leak in 2 different radiator hoses.
    (Will this fucking day ever end. I started this at about 6pm. It is now 8pm. I stopped for dinner and dishes. It just keeps going just like the Energizer Bunny.)
    So I get the info from her and ask how much it will cost. She says she will call back when they get an estimate. Now I'm going to say this now- I trust my mechanic very much. We have been going to him for almost 4 years now. He is a good guy and has been trying to get us to sell this vehicle for 3 years now. He treats us very good. He gives us all the parts we buy at his cost. No mark up. If a job takes 6 hours to do he only charges 3.5-4 hours. Every time I go to him I bring him a 36 pack of beer when the job is done. He has even offered to take me fishing on his boat. (he should do that I helped him buy the boat with all the business I send him through my cars and friends that I send his way).
    Anyways she calls me back 45 minutes later and I can't understand a single word she is saying. Finally she just tells me to go to the shop after work. That gets me all worked up. Not angry but worried. So by the time I came back to my yard at lunch time I was not in a good mood. So my Leadworker starts telling me stuff that my supervisor has said during the day before he left early to go home. He really got me pissed. I had an idea yesterday and my boss turned it down for no reason. It would have made our job easier. He said no. So today he tells us to do what I suggested yesterday but in a different way. I wanted to take some stuff out of a dump truck by dumping it into the bucket of a front end loader. Then dump the bucket into the dumpster. He said NO! Today he tells us to take the stuff from the dumptruck and put it into the dumpster by using shovels. It will save time he says. Oh My Fucking God! My way would have taken 3 minutes tops. He wants us to shovel this stuff out by hand. Taking roughly 30 minutes. I told my leadworker that my boss was smoking crack and he needed to go fuck himself. To which he replied you can't say stuff like that around me (Because technically he needs to report me for it as workplace violence. Not because he agrees with the boss which he don't). I said watch me J____ is on crack and needs to go fuck himself. Nothing came out of it. The job did not get done as my leadworker made up another job for us instead.
    So I got off work and went to the shop. I was told that I really need to sell that vehicle now. As a rough estimate it will cost between 1500 and 2000. That is without reworking the heads. If they are warped it will go up more. I just love how dependent we have become on cars now.
    After leaving the shop I come home and my wife is apologizing to me like she did something wrong. (she still is and I don't know why). I told her its not her fault. The truck is just a piece of shit. We bought it in July of 2001. In Dec we put a new tranny in it for 3000. 1 year later the heater core goes out. 700. 6 months later the head gasket goes out. 900. 1 year later the other tranny goes out. Another 3000. Then last summer we had starting problems the whole summer. The shop worked on it all summer but could not find the problem. Didn't charge us for any of the work. the whole summer until they were sure it was fixed. Finally they found the problem. The Anti-theft relay was bad. It would cost 700 to replace it or they would bypass it for a case of beer. They were trying to diagnose the problem for over 80 hours and only charged me a case of beer. The problem would go away as soon as we would get it to the shop. And stay away for 2 weeks at a time. Finally the shop would start coming to us where ever we were broke down at. That's how they found the problem.
    Any how I went to the chevy dealer in town to talk to them. Unfortunately my wife talked to a friend that works there and told them the problem with the vehicle. Good Bye trade in. So I'm went to the Dodge dealer and talked to him. I went out with the sole purpose of getting options. Nothing more. I came home talked to my wife and she got pissed at me because she hates Dodge. I told her that we are NOT in a position to be picky. We need to take what we can get. They have a Neon that is 1 year old with 10k miles on it that we might be able to afford. But I was just getting options. She then got upset with me about the fact that she only wants to look at Chevy's or Saturns. Again I told her that we aren't in a position to be choosey. She went on more about the issue so I told her I needed to walk away. We were both getting angry and I didn't want to fight. So I went to my comfort zone. The Blogs.
    After dinner we talked a little more but the kids kept interrupting. She is still crying and is very upset. I'm feeling like failure for not being able to keep us in a situation where we have a decent car. To top it all off we can't afford to fix the car. And we can't afford to buy a new one. The Explorer will be paid off as soon as we sign papers on the house. (that's another thing. I called the lady we have been dealing with today to see how the loan is coming along. She said that the lending company is behind on the paper work and it will be at least another week. It has already been 2 weeks since the lender received the papers from us. So my dad wants me to call the lady and get the appraisal from her and tell her that if we don't have papers to sign by Fri. night we will find someone else. I feel wrong for doing that so I haven't done it yet.) Back to the car. We will be paying it off when we buy the house. When we close escrow my wife and I will receive a check for 25000 to pay off student loans, credit cards, and the Explorer. With maybe 1000 left over. We are paying all this off just so we can manage to make the house payments. Where did I go wrong? Actually I think I have a problem that I read about on Space of Dysfunction. We tried to keep up with the Jones's and we have been living outside our means for years and it is starting to bite us in the ass now.
    So that is my fucked up day. I'm still pissed at the way things are going in life. I'm waiting for my wife to get our youngest to sleep and I'm going to put her in the bath tub. And taking some advice from Venting Houswife I'm going to put some candles around the tub, let my wife soak for a while then I'm going to wash her off and got to bed. Unfortunately we have no bubble bath for her soak in. I just want this day to end.

    Sunday, September 25, 2005

    Not much going on

    Well there's not much going on today. We woke up late so that put a damper on the morning. Actually I woke up at 5 but I was enjoying lying next to my wife so I just stayed in bed. She didn't wake up till 8. So I just held her for a couple hours. Then we just laid in bed holding each other. I love weekends! Unfortunately that's all we saw of each other today. I changed her oil and she went to work. She should be home anytime now though.
    So what I'm going to do instead is post a recipe. I love to cook. So I figured I could share some of my favorite things to cook. Today's recipe is Better Than Sex Cake. MMMM MMMMM Good!
    Ingredients: 1 box German chocolate cake mix
    1 can sweetened condensed milk
    1 jar Mrs. Smiths butterscotch Caramel sauce
    2 Heath Bars
    1 container Cool Whip
    1 bag Milk Chocolate chips (I prefer Guittard)
    Make cake as per directions on box. Bake for 8 minutes and drop chocolate chips into cake. Finish baking remainder of time. When cake is done remove from oven and poke many holes in cake with the end of a wooden spoon. Pour condensed milk over cake being sure to fill all the holes, then place in fridge overnight. Next day pour jar of Mrs. Smiths over cake. Spread Cool Whip over cake. Break heath bars into small pieces and sprinkle over cake. Keep refridgerated. Enjoy.
    This cake is really good. It's rich though. Don't tell your significant other that wow this is better than sex. You won't be getting any for a while even if it is a joke. Speaking from experience.

    Just posted that because there's really nothing more to post right now and I want to try to post more often with out starting controversy in doing so.

    Saturday, September 24, 2005

    Thank You!

    A Big Thank You goes out to Frustrated for helping me with the code for video. I just added the video to my page. It is of Evanescence, and the song is My Immortal. (I have a thing for the lead singer of this group Amy Lee. As long as she's not wearing the Goth makeup of all white face.) It use to be the ring tone for my wife when she called my phone. Now it is Broken by Seether featuring Amy Lee. I will use that video in a few days.

    We didn't do much today. We woke up late and ate breakfast. After we ate I did the dishes and started to get some of my stuff ready for my trip with my dad next week. I can't wait. After lunch time we went into town (What we call town anyways. It's 20 miles away) and went to the mall. It's been 2 years since I stepped into a mall. I can't believe I used to hang out there for fun just 14 years ago when I was in school. I can't believe how many freaky kids hang out there and that I used to be one of those freaks. We just walked around for awhile. My wife then surprised us by taking us to Cold Stone Creamery. It was my first time there and it was good. We came home and played in the back yard with the kids while I cooked dinner. And that was our day. My wife is reading a bed time story to the kids and then putting them to bed.

    Tonight I am going to shave my beard off 6 months early. I usually keep it from mid Aug. to the end of duck season in Jan. This year I can't stand it. The main reason for shaving it is that it seems to get in the way when I go to kiss my wife or take a bite of food. I asked her again what she wanted. She said it's your body do what you want I don't care. So I might even shave off the goatee too. The mustache stays. I think I look like a kid without it. And that's the excitement for the day. Oh we did dance for a few minutes in the kitchen before doing dishes after dinner. I was enjoying it till the kids wanted to stand between us. That ended it for me.
    Good Night!

    Friday, September 23, 2005

    A question for fellow Bloggers

    I was looking at the new format of Frustrated's blog today and liked the way she added the music video. I tried to add one to mine this afternoon. I got the video to appear on the blog but it was way down at the bottom of the page. It also moved everything that was on the right column to the bottom of the page also. How do I get it to appear on the right column just below my profile and keep all the other stuff that is on that column in the place it is now? I would ask her on her site but she blocked comments on that topic.

    Thanks in advance for any help! I'll get the hang of this stuff at some point.

    The ups and downs of life

    First off I'd like to thank you all for your input on the performance problem last week. Looking back on it I think that I was trying to hard to make it happen to fit it into the time constraints. Besides last night was wonderful. ;) Like Digger said we are in a much better spot than we have been in that department.

    Yesterday at work I seemed to be having a good day so I called my wife and asked her to bring our youngest son to my yard so we could go out to lunch. She agreed and picked me up and we went to Mc Donalds. (yeah I'm a real extravagant guy ;p ) It was nice to be able to go out to lunch with my wife and son. We had a good time.

    Later that day when I came home from work the kids were at our neighbors house playing with their son. We talked for a little while and the day was still going pretty darn good. We cooked dinner together and after dinner I decided to let my sons go play in the backyard and I helped my wife with the dishes. Thats when the down hit. I was standing behind my wife giving her a hug and talking about how hot I was. So I asked her if she would like me to cut my hair or let it grow back out. She said it was up to me. I said I don't care tell me what you want. Would you like me to trim my beard too or even shave it off? She said it's your body do what you want. My response was I know it's my hair and beard I'm asking because I want to know what you want. I just want to make you happy. At that point she started crying. A lot. Her face got all puffy and tears were srteaming down her face. So instantly I thought that I did something wrong to upset her, and asked what was wrong. She said she didn't know. Nothing was wrong. Me being the idiot male I am kept pushing it asking why she was crying, what did I do or say. She kept saying nothing. So the rest of the night was spent in silence. After the kids went to bed she came to the computer with me and sat on my lap and actually read a few Blogs. She seems to be interested in ~anne's Blog. She started taking control of the mouse and browsed my site for awhile. When we got to the post entitled Am I whipped? she read the part about her "assets" . She says 'Oh great. Now I have assets!' I told her I didn't know what else to say. She then thought that what I meant by being whipped was that she bosses me around. I had her read the whole post and she understood. We went to bed and I asked her again what was wrong and she said she's not really happy, but couldn't explain why. So I just held her and we went to sleep.

    Today was a decent day. I came home from work early so that she could go to a job interview at the "retirement" community in town. It's actually one of those Active Adult Communities where you need to be over 55 to live there. Apparently they are looking for a Massage Therapist to work in their gym. She said that the interview went real good and that as of now she is the front runner for the job. So she is in a good mood today and is happy now. So We'll see how she's doing when she comes home from work tonight.

    Wednesday, September 21, 2005

    The performance problem

    I guess I'm going to tell what happened last week. I'm still a little upset about it but so far no repeat problems.

    When I came home from work last Thur. I talked to my wife about the payday shopping that we needed to do. She said that all she needed to do was change clothes and she'd be ready. So I followed her to the bedroom to take a shower. When we got to the room I closed the door and started kissing her and pulled her top off. We started kissing each other for awhile when the phone rang. So I went to the phone and answered it. It was for my wife so I gave it to her and continued where we left off before the phone rang. (Hey the other person couldn't see me). When she hung up she was ready to go and so was I. The problem was not getting things hard. We made love for quite some time. The problem came when I couldn't. The soldier came to the battle ready to fight but when he pulled the trigger the bullet didn't go off. There was no climax. After being in the room making love for an hour I could not complete even though she did a few times. So she said that it was ok, we could try again later that night. We decided to take a shower together and that was when the other problem hit. Usually when we take a shower together I get hard at the site of her. But that day I guess after not completing I couldn't get hard with her in the shower with me. That got me really upset and it bothered me the rest of the night.

    Later that night after the kids were asleep we started making love again. I almost felt like it was going to happen again. I could get hard but the feeling was not there for me to complete. I finally did complete but it seemed forced from me and not 'natural'. It also took a lot longer than usual. (I guess thats not all to bad but that night it was). Since then we have only made love one time and things were fine. It still bothers me though about that night.

    It seems we are changing places in our love making. I used to be the one to finish first and it would take her awhile. But now she climaxes first and I climax later. It's just never had to be 'forced' out till now. So there is the problem I had. Even though I know it's not true it still makes me feel like I'm no longer all the man that I should be.

    A sons Bday and some notes

    So yesterday was my sons Bday. He is now 11 years old. We had my parents, sister, and grandma over for some cake and his presents. He had a good time last night. While they were all here we found out my parents are going to put there house up for sale pretty soon and move into my town. My dad is retiring in Dec. and my mom is retiring in Aug. They have already booked a cruise in Aug. to celebrate.

    So today by taking an idea I got off another Blog I started to send my wife some sexy text messages today. I was telling her what I wanted to do to her when she got home from work. She never responded to any of them. While I was getting turned on just writing them. So around lunch time she calls me up and asks what I want for dinner. I told her I don't know. Then the subject came around to the text messages and she said light heartedly that they were annoying her because she was busy doing housework. It hurt my feelings so I stopped the messages for awhile. Then I decided to try again anyways. I told her that if she didn't like it slow like I was telling her that I would give it to her real fast and hard like she likes. She replied by saying that I was mean. I was going to talk to her about it when I got home but she was in the shower. So I went online to check my email. Glad I did. This is why I go over the cell bill with a fine tooth comb. It said we went over our minutes by like 150 minutes. I know we did not do that. We have 1000 minutes shared plus free weekends, nights and mobile to mobile. Well I spent 1 hour on the phone with the phone company and got it all straightened out. They charged us for weekends, nights and mobile to mobile. They over charged us 600 minutes that were supposed to be free. Saved me 80 dollars in overages. Thats why I check the cell bill closely.

    We have not heard back from my wife's sister. I talked to her about the situation on Mon. and she was very excited about it but no calls yet. So we are still waiting. I'll call her again tomorrow.

    Monday, September 19, 2005

    I'm running out of ideas for titles :(

    Well I'm not sure where to begin. It's been a week since I last posted. I have been reading and posting some comments on the Blogs I read though. There have been some good reads out there this past week. ~Anne posted a good question about why do you Blog. I really liked Lizzies answer that was posted on her site. (I forgot how to do links in posts). Lizzie brought up how she feels that she gets to know the people who's blogs she reads and I feel that way to. It also upsets me when someone takes down there Blog do to being 'found' out. I just don't get it. If it being written anonymously why should it matter? It doesn't bother me knowing that someone I know finds this site. But that's just me. (I know it sounds contradictory about that statement knowing that I won't tell my family about what happened with us). But maybe in a way I hope that I get found out so that I won't have to keep this whole thing a secret. Eventhough things are better now. Things aren't as good as I'd like them to be but they are a lot better than they were this time last year.
    So anyways Things have been pretty slow in the Confused household. I worked all weekend long. I got 21 hours OT over the weekend plus another 10 M-F. We are finally done with our big paving jobs this year. :)! (I whish Blogger had smilies.) My dad and I are getting ready for our vacation in 2 weeks. My wife has decided not to write a letter to the paper at this time. We figure that if she were to do that she would be giving in to the coward who wrote the original letter. Although it has been a big topic at my work. They want to know if my wife is running a brothel why do I drive vehicles that are falling apart.
    Here is the big problem of the week though. My wife went back to the school and signed up for the classes that she wants to take. Which is fine that she wants to go back to school. Here's the problem that we (I) am coming up with. Most of them are little things but I still think about everything. I think that may be part of my problem. I over think things to much. 1) Paying for a babysitter 2)Paying for gas. 3) How will we make the housepayments if she is no longer working at the store (most important) 4)We will never see each other because she will got to school Mon. - Thur. & work Fri. - Sun. This last one is an important one for me on many different ways. In a previous comment an anonymous person asked me why I don't give up hunting so that we can get my wife the things she needs for her business. Well I never answered that person until now. I would give up hunting for this year to support my family. I have done it in the past for 5 years in a row. I can't really do that this year. For my birthday last year my dad spent $1000.00 to get me into his hunting club. If I don't go hunting with him this year all that money will be wasted. He had to do an awful lot to convince my mom to go for that idea. I'm caught in the middle here. The most important person in my life is my wife. My dad is also a huge part of my life even though I'm grown and out of the house. I don't want to let either one of them down. Right now though I need to let one of them down. Sometimes I hate being an adult and making adult decisions. I may have found a cure but won't know for sure till my wifes sister calls me back in a day or 2. I might have my sister-in-law move in with us. She is on probation and needs to check it with her probation officer. Right now she is not allowed to leave the county that she lives in. We are going to see if she can move in here and get a probation officer in this county if she has employment here. She will have 2 jobs. One will be to watch the kids when my wife is at school and I'm at work or out hunting. In return she will get room and board. The other job will hopefully be at the store my wife works at. We are hoping that my wifes boss will hire her sister to take over the shifts that my wife will be opening.
    Yes she is on probation but I do trust her. I'm actually more protective of her than my own sister. I know my sister can take care of herself but my sister-in-law needs someone to look out for her. As far as what she's on probation for that's not something that needs airing out. I'll air out my dirty laundry but not hers.

    There is something else that has been bothering me about myself. I had some"performance" issues last week but am still trying to find the courage to talk about them. I'd like to be able to write like Venting Housewife or Housewyfe with benefits but I'd like to have my wife read this Blog when she wants. And that would definitely not be kosher with her.

    Wednesday, September 14, 2005

    A bad day for my wife

    The following letter was sent to the city Chamber of Commerce this week in the town that I live in. This letter was given to my wife today as she went to the Chamber to pay her fees for joining. To give you some info she is a Certified Massage Therapist, went to school for 10 months to become certified, as I've stated before she takes her career very seriously. She has stated that she did not pick this career God picked it for her. It is her calling. She also has a business license with the city. She is not the person that the letter refers to as living in the community the person who's name was deleted), but she is the person offering the back to school special.

    My Town Chamber of Commerce:


    I do read your approved ads in the Local Paper weekly and have notice a marked decline in the types of businesses that you are recommending. If they are in your section, I assume that you are sanctioning them, correct?

    I did notice a few weeks ago that you started adding massage therapists (parlors) in your sanctioned section. By all appearances you are approving and promoting what is commonly known as a front for prostitution, in most cases. There is only a non-local phone number for this (name deleted) person, so this is obviously a cell phone and absolutely no address? What kind of people and what kind of ads are you condoning! If you doubt what I am saying, please check your own approved ad for this "business" and tell me what the "other services also provided" pertains to. How more suggestive can you get.

    . These are the kind of businesses that have-been known to degrade communities and cause the wrong kind of people to be drawn to your town. Does she work out of the local motel room for an hour at a time? How can you accept this kind of "business" in what you want to be a legitimate promotion of local businesses? Do you know if these people have business licenses and are paying the proper taxes and fees which add revenue to the city coffers, or are you just promoting un-licensed businesses just to get your Chamber of Commerce fee?

    In the following weeks, you 'have added another massage therapist (parlor), this one trying to get kids in with a very bad taste "back to school special". At least this one has an address!! Why would the (MY Town) Chamber of Commerce promote this type of business since it is known that this kind of business has always attracted the wrong type of people to areas and has degraded the community? So when will you start promoting the complete line of adult entertainment complexes and really make (My Town) look like a seedy community. After all, I have already heard that (My Town) is known as the "Ghetto of (My County) County". By you promoting these ads, you are continuing this reputation.

    _ ---.­

    We don't have enough police to keep these kind of businesses monitored, especially when they will not even give their addresses. These people should be run out of town and not promoted in your publications. I also believe that this (Name Deleted) person is running her "business" out of her bedroom in a rental house in the (Housing Development) complex. If so, this is a clear violation of the CC&R's. There are no home businesses allowed according to these governing rules. She violates many of the other CC&R's just by looking at her un-maintained rental property. This is another indication of how these kinds of people can easily disappear when they need to. There is no investment in the community, just use and abuse.

    If I am wrong, I apologize, but it is obvious that (My Town) and the (Housing Development) development in
    particular is rapidly becoming a slum.

    A very concerned citizen interested in the viability of a prosperous and upstanding community.

    CC: Mayors Office

    So that was the letter that was mailed to the Chamber. She spoke to the head of the Chamber and that person was very upset about the letter and said she will back my wife and the other party 100%. Both massage Therapists are licensed with the city. My wife took this letter very hard and was almost in tears when she talked to me about it. I didn't know what to say except to hold her until she went to work. She is in the process of writing a letter with the cooperation of the Chamber to be published in the next issue of the paper. (It only comes out once a week.) The thing that will really piss off the letter writer is that in the next issue my wifes add will no longer have an address but instead read "Mobile Massage! We come to you!" As she lost her space in the "Massage Parlor". She is also not using a local phone number but her cell number instead. This person really made my blood boil. Mainly because the person did not have the balls to sign their name. Pussy! I guess that is better though so I can't look up there name and address in the phone book or online. (I love the internet!) So she is now at work and I'm at home fuming.

    I'll post more later. I'm going to my Grandma's now.

    Monday, September 12, 2005

    Great Weekend!

    Well we had a dam good weekend. We didn't go anywhere just stayed home but we had some good alone time on Sat. morning. The kids slept in and when they woke up our oldest son made breakfast for himself and his younger brother. Then they watched a movie. This allowed my wife and I to stay in our room till 10:30. The rest of the day was spent doing laundry for me. I took the kids out for awhile so my wife could spend some time taking a nap in the afternoon. She was tired for some reason. :) Later that night after the kids went to bed she actually came over to the couch and sat on my lap to watch a movie with me. It was great. We spent about 2 hours on the couch just cuddling and holding each other. ( I love to just sit and hold my wife.) On Sun. she went to church and left the kids with me. The youngest got in trouble last week so he had to stay home this week. The oldest wouldn't take a shower so he could go. She then had to go to work for the rest of the day.
    So this weekend was not the weekend for me to go with her to church. I told her I will try and go with her next weekend if I don't work. My boss wants us to work 20 hours OT next Sat. & Sun. We did talk about her going back to school. As much as we both want her to go we decided that it could wait till the class is offered again in the spring. That will give us a chance to get comfortable with the house payments. The other thing is she would have to quit her job at the store to get the hours of school in. It was something that she brought up herself. So she is willing to wait till spring and we'll go from there.
    Also a Thank You goes out to Digger. He made a comment that my wife had to comment on. She then spent the next 30 minutes looking at my Blog and others without making grunting noises.

    Also have I mentioned how much I love my wife? Back in June she ordered my Fathers day present. Well it finally came in the mail today. She got me a custom and numbered goose call. It is #15 of 22. I've been wanting this call for months, and she got it for me. I'm going to have to thank her for it when she gets home from work tonight.

    Wednesday, September 07, 2005

    Wow. My creative juices are not flowing anymore. After yesterdays post giving some history about myself I'm not sure what else to say. There's not much going on in my life anymore to post about. I'm not going to try and start something either. My wife and I are actually in pretty good place right now. We're both sleeping better at night now. Except for the cat waking us up. I got a cat for my wife the night of my last post back in May. She is now very active and wants to play in the middle of the night. Specifically she wants to attack my feet. If it's not that she gets as close to my wifes head as possible and purr loudly. We didn't get a chance to talk today because I was late coming home from work. By the time I got home she was at work already. That's the way our day goes. I get home and she's walking out the door 40 minutes later. She gets home and it's 10 at night and bedtime. We did talk on the phone today and she wants to go back to school again this winter. She needs to get 300 more hours of school and she will be a Holistic Healthcare Practitioner. They will teach her Hot Stone Massage and she will also be able to work on pregnant women. The really good thing is that they have a class that covers the National Massage Therapist Exam. When she takes that test she will no longer be a Certified Massage Therapist. She will be a Licensed Massage Therapist. That means she can work anywhere in the US. We are going to talk about it when she gets home. I'd love for her to go back to school and get her license. We just need to talk about the finances for it. When she went to school the first time it was at night. I could stay at home with the kids while she was at school. This new course is in the afternoons. We need to have a babysitter for 3 hours till I get home. She'll go to school just need to figure things out.
    So for now thats all there is. If you have any questions for me about my past go ahead and ask. I'd be glad to answer. I won't tell much about my wifes past except for what I have already given. She has told me that she will NOT be posting anything on this site. She says all she would be able to say are bad things and she don't want to do that.

    Tuesday, September 06, 2005

    Not much going on.

    Well there's not to much going on since my last update. I did get the motivation to get the garage cleaned out finally. What a difference. Now I just need to get the workbench and closets straightened out. I even had enough motivation to edge the lawn on Sun. too. I've lived here for 4 years and 11 months and that was the first time the lawn was edged. I had to borrow the edger from my neighbor. Thats definitely on the list of things to get when I'm a homeowner. Along with a lot of other things. So that takes care of Sun. Oh I also got called to work. A drunk driver hit a stop sign on the highway and I had to replace it. Easy 4 hours OT.
    On Mon. we went to my parents house for a BBQ. The kids got to meet the new dog. He's really shy of new people. We think he was abused in his last home. This is the 3rd home he's been in in the last month. He's about 13 months old. After about 4 hours he finally opened up and started to play with the kids. He would chase them for a while then they would chase him. While I was down there I went through some old photos from before I was born to when I was about 10. It's amazing how much we all have changed since then. I decided to take on a new project now. I'm going to scan all of my parents photos onto the computer. If I can figure it out I'll try to make a slide show of them on a DVD. Side note : If anyone knows of a place to convert old 35mm slides to disk and convert 8mm movies to disk could you let me know please. My parents have a bunch of slides and movies from when my sister and I were kids.
    My wife and I are doing pretty good at the moment. We're not really doing much hence the loss of things to say.
    So here's a little about myself. I'm 31 years old, 5'11" tall, and am overweight. I weigh about 280. My whole family is big. My kids luckily got my wifes metabolism. They eat and don't gain weight. I graduated High School in '92 at the bottom of my class. Barely even graduated. Funny when I went back to school in '95 I got a high GPA. Graduated with my AA degree in '97 with a 3.4 GPA. I never had a girlfriend in high school. Never even went on dates. Didn't do drugs or drink in school either. When I graduated thats when all that changed. I got high the first time in Oct. of '92 and loved it. I smoked pot every day a couple times a day till I met my wife in July of '93. I loved to smoke weed. Started drinking too. Not a lot but enough. Then I got my first gf in Feb. of '93. It was a weird relationship to say the least. All we had in common was sex, drugs and ............ I guess that was it. She was a wild girl. She would do anything anywhere. Didn't matter who was watching either. I broke up with her a month later. Then there was my second gf in May same year. All we had in common was well........ see previous gf. But she messed with me. I never did meth/crank till I met her. Did that wasn't to crazy about it but did it to be with her. The only good thing about crank was the sex. We would go for hours. Then I made the 2 biggest mistakes of my life. 1) got her pregnant. 2)Introduced my sister to crank (she loved it and did it from '93 till '02/03. along with much worse drugs). This gf got pregnant, decided she did not want my baby (found out after we broke up) and did an 8 ball at once to kill the baby. I never saw her again and never touched crank again either. She messed me up big time. So then in July I met my future wife. We met on July 30, 1993. We started dating on Sept. 5, 1993. After we started dating getting high was no fun anymore. Since Sept. 1993 I've got high about 6-7 times. Thats when the problems started with my sister and wife. Those problems lasted until about 2 years ago when my sister graduated from rehab. My wife never did any drugs so I stopped when we started dating. Thus I didn't hang out with the same people. Those people (sister) didn't like that. Wife didn't like sisters influence on me. I was in the middle as I loved them both. So then came Nov. 25, 1993 Thanksgiving day. That was the day I asked her to marry me. She said yes. That weekend I got kicked out of my parents house because she spent the night in my room. Even though we did not have sex. She had the flu, I slept on the floor she slept in my bed. So I moved into her moms house. On Feb. 1, 1994 we found out we were pregnant. I was so happy and so was my wife/fiance'. That was 12 days before I turned 20. We got married in March of '94. 11 Days after our wedding I went to Al. for basic training in the Army.
    So that is the beginning of our relationship. From time we met to date of marriage was 8 months. I still to this day don't regret any of our time together. There are some parts of my past I'm not proud of ie. second girlfriend, the drugs, and introducing my sister to Meth/crank (but hind site if it wasn't me it would have been someone else). But that is my life. It made me who I am today. If I can help someone with my mistakes then it wasn't a total failure. Thats the way my sister sees it now too. She has been sober for 33 months now. She is a sponsor to people in AA and NA. She went from a person that I didn't want to talk to or be around my kids to one of the strongest people I know. I'm very proud of her and still love my little sister.
    Till next time.

    Saturday, September 03, 2005

    The new Layout

    Well for some odd reason I decided to change the layout of my site tonight. I'll never do that again. When I did this it cleared all the changes that I had made to my site. I had to renter all the Sites I frequent. Not that big of a deal but time consuming. The bad thing is that I can't get my site meter running again. Other than that I like the way it looks. Not much else to report on now though. I spent the day with my dad today. We went to get him a new dog. He put his last one to sleep about a month ago. He had cancer. So we got him a new German Shorthair from a lady that does rescue work on Pointing Breeds of dogs. He's a year old and is already birdy. Once he gets used to his new surroundings the fun begins in training our newest hunting partner. I'm now looking forward to the upcoming season a little bit now. Yippee! Another good thing is that I'm getting my first massage in about 2 months tonight when the kids got to bed. It is nice being married to a Massage Therapist.;)

    Thursday, September 01, 2005

    Now that I'm off my Soap Box

    Well that was a refreshing rant. So anyways I was talking to my wife today about maybe seeing if she would be willing to write some on my Blog. See if she would want to tell her side of the story. I really think that people need to hear both sides of a story to get the whole picture. She seemed turned off by the idea. She knows that I write here and that I look at other peoples Blogs but she don't like the idea. She don't see why I feel the need to look at some one else's entries or even why people would write down there thoughts for the whole world to see. My hope is that maybe if enough people who read my site will like the idea of her telling her side or at least have some questions for her that she could answer that she would at least try. So what do you think? Should I try to get her to write here?

    On to other things. In reading M's Blog The Tale of My Discreet Affair I decided to take some of her ideas. She has decided to set goals for her site and I have decided to try for the same thing. I'm not going to set as many goals as she has but I want to get some things accomplished here. So here are some of my goals (more might come later).

    1. Try to get my wife to tell her side of the story or give some opinions. At the very least I'd like he to answer any questions. I know this might not be the best thing for me but it would help paint the whole picture. I have been a total ass in my life and am willing to take responsibility for that now.
    2. I want to try to post some more positive things about our life in general. There are times when we are completely happy. I want to start sharing those times here. It might help me to change my outlook on life in general.
    3. I'd like to get some more comments but that is not a big deal to me. Well maybe wrong wording. I'd like to try and get some more input from the people who stop by and read my ramblings.
    4. This last one is more of a request than a goal. I'd like to see if the readers have any questions for my wife that she might be able (willing) to answer.
    5. I'd like to learn how some of the other people on the Blog sites are doing some of their things. Like I found out how to put links on my site to other sites. But how do some of the sites put asterisk by the blogs that have been recently updated. Or how do you get the link top appear that says other sites that link here. Their are more but can't remember them at the moment.

    So those are my goals for now. I have some personal goals but those are personal. The biggest is to STOP the cravings for a dam cigarette. It's been a month now and the cravings won't go away. I've quit before for years at a time but this time the cravings won't stop. They are the worst after I eat a meal.

    I talked to my wife yesterday about her being upset at me when I tell her she is beautiful. She says it's because she don't feel that way. But she did say that is ok for me to call her my pretty wife. So at least that is a positive thing. So for now that's all to say. I'm getting tired so good night.

    The state of the world

    This evening my 10 year old son had a homework assignment to watch the evening news. I pretty much don't watch the news at all. But for the sake of homework I did tonight. I was disgusted by what I saw. Thus reinforcing why I don't watch the news. They were showing coverage of New Orleans. Looters have taken over the city and people are shooting at rescue helicopters. What the fuck are these people thinking? The National Guard is now needing to do police action instead of rescue operations AND rescue volunteers and ambulance companies are saying they can't help people until they get more security for them. Then there are reports that they are having more problems in the Superdome which is being setup as a shelter. There are shootings, rapes and thievery going on in there. This is NOT the time for these actions to be going on. People need to be pulling together to help one another out. Or is that just my idealistic mind talking? It's one thing if a city wants to destroy itself by looting after their team wins the World Series or whatever. In that case I say fence off the 'war zone' and let nature take it's course. But how can you do this here?

    I guess that's it for this topic. I just needed to go on my soapbox for awhile. Thanks for letting me vent.