Monday, September 19, 2005

I'm running out of ideas for titles :(

Well I'm not sure where to begin. It's been a week since I last posted. I have been reading and posting some comments on the Blogs I read though. There have been some good reads out there this past week. ~Anne posted a good question about why do you Blog. I really liked Lizzies answer that was posted on her site. (I forgot how to do links in posts). Lizzie brought up how she feels that she gets to know the people who's blogs she reads and I feel that way to. It also upsets me when someone takes down there Blog do to being 'found' out. I just don't get it. If it being written anonymously why should it matter? It doesn't bother me knowing that someone I know finds this site. But that's just me. (I know it sounds contradictory about that statement knowing that I won't tell my family about what happened with us). But maybe in a way I hope that I get found out so that I won't have to keep this whole thing a secret. Eventhough things are better now. Things aren't as good as I'd like them to be but they are a lot better than they were this time last year.
So anyways Things have been pretty slow in the Confused household. I worked all weekend long. I got 21 hours OT over the weekend plus another 10 M-F. We are finally done with our big paving jobs this year. :)! (I whish Blogger had smilies.) My dad and I are getting ready for our vacation in 2 weeks. My wife has decided not to write a letter to the paper at this time. We figure that if she were to do that she would be giving in to the coward who wrote the original letter. Although it has been a big topic at my work. They want to know if my wife is running a brothel why do I drive vehicles that are falling apart.
Here is the big problem of the week though. My wife went back to the school and signed up for the classes that she wants to take. Which is fine that she wants to go back to school. Here's the problem that we (I) am coming up with. Most of them are little things but I still think about everything. I think that may be part of my problem. I over think things to much. 1) Paying for a babysitter 2)Paying for gas. 3) How will we make the housepayments if she is no longer working at the store (most important) 4)We will never see each other because she will got to school Mon. - Thur. & work Fri. - Sun. This last one is an important one for me on many different ways. In a previous comment an anonymous person asked me why I don't give up hunting so that we can get my wife the things she needs for her business. Well I never answered that person until now. I would give up hunting for this year to support my family. I have done it in the past for 5 years in a row. I can't really do that this year. For my birthday last year my dad spent $1000.00 to get me into his hunting club. If I don't go hunting with him this year all that money will be wasted. He had to do an awful lot to convince my mom to go for that idea. I'm caught in the middle here. The most important person in my life is my wife. My dad is also a huge part of my life even though I'm grown and out of the house. I don't want to let either one of them down. Right now though I need to let one of them down. Sometimes I hate being an adult and making adult decisions. I may have found a cure but won't know for sure till my wifes sister calls me back in a day or 2. I might have my sister-in-law move in with us. She is on probation and needs to check it with her probation officer. Right now she is not allowed to leave the county that she lives in. We are going to see if she can move in here and get a probation officer in this county if she has employment here. She will have 2 jobs. One will be to watch the kids when my wife is at school and I'm at work or out hunting. In return she will get room and board. The other job will hopefully be at the store my wife works at. We are hoping that my wifes boss will hire her sister to take over the shifts that my wife will be opening.
Yes she is on probation but I do trust her. I'm actually more protective of her than my own sister. I know my sister can take care of herself but my sister-in-law needs someone to look out for her. As far as what she's on probation for that's not something that needs airing out. I'll air out my dirty laundry but not hers.

There is something else that has been bothering me about myself. I had some"performance" issues last week but am still trying to find the courage to talk about them. I'd like to be able to write like Venting Housewife or Housewyfe with benefits but I'd like to have my wife read this Blog when she wants. And that would definitely not be kosher with her.


Lizzie said...

Don't be so hard on yourself for "overthinking" things. You are planning ahead! All of the things you discuss are important issues that need to be considered. I know it's tough to make the money situation tighter but education almost always pays off in the long run. Your wife will not only make more money, but she'll be happier having a career doing something she loves. Having your SIL move in sounds like it could solve a couple of problems.

As to the perfomance problems... this would be a perfect format to discuss them in. There are lots of readers who have a good deal of experience with this. The amount of men with performance problems is higher than most people think. There have been studies putting it at over 50%. So you are not alone. And often the solution is pretty simple.

bedroomdancer said...

Sounds like you are doing your best to work out the money situation, you have some good ideas. I know you'll figure it out.

Just because you had performance issues once, doesn't mean it will happen over and over. It happens, we all get over tired, stressed, distracted. Just dive back in!

Frustrated said...

Sorry to read about the things going on with your wife. I do hope that things get better for her. BTW... you're right about posting anonymously. It shouldn't matter if someone finds out. You're part of the reason I've decided to start blogging again. Thanks!

Confused Husband said...

Frustrated Welcome back! I missed you. I'm tryuing to open your Blog now but I'm haveing some problems with Blogger tonight. Anyways glad your back. :)
Lizzie and Bedroomdancer We are just waiting to here from my wifes sister now to see if it's ok for her to come live with us for awhile.
As to the other problem maybe I'll talk more about it tomorrow when I update my Blog.

Colonel Ingers said...

"Performance"....even the description gives an idea of how much pressure us guys can be under sometimes(normally self-inflicted).
The lack of physical response in men (despite the desire) is normally due to stress of some kind.
Give yourself a break, don't set yourself up for failure - if you can't get hard, use your mouth, fingers, tongue. You can see sex as a chance to let yourself down and disappoint your wife or as a grand opportunity for experimentation and a walk in a garden of new delights. If you MUST think while making love - concentrate only on givimg your wife pleasure.....tease her, please her, play with her.
A couple of backward steps often help us leap further.

~ anne said...

there is nothing wrong with thinking the situation through and coming up with a plan. if it is meant to be it will all work out. don't stress yourself out about it though, that won't help.

keeping my fingers crossed for you!


The Venting Housewife said...

Yeah I would definitely not stress about it that may be worse. I think it could be a good idea if your SIL moves it, it may give your wife someone to talk to.
I think you should definitely write what you want on here, its your space. And the ones that come here, aren't here to judge you or your wife. We are here to read (and be nosey teehee), and give advice where we can. It also helps to let it out, blogging is a great stress reliever.
Oh and thanks for the kudos on my writing ;)