I was beginning to think that today would never get here. Let's just say that I'm so glad it's over.
Well now I'm really feeling like shit. Not only is my funk (that's what I'm calling my state of mind right now) causing problems with me, but now it's really causing problems with Summer as well. She's walking around the house apologizing for shit that she didn't even do. This is so Fucked up! She's avoiding talking to me right now. Apparently she thinks she will say the wrong thing. That is SO not true. What I want more than anything right now is for her to sit with me and talk with me. She can't so the wrong thing to me as long as she is open and honest. I want to be with her. And at the same time I want to just be alone. I don't know what I want. I'm so .... oh I don't know what the word is. I just can't find anything to satisfy me at the moment. Nothing is on TV that looks interesting. I've read all your blogs over and over again. I can't sleep as I'm not tired enough. My s-i-l has us watching the STUPIDEST movie right now. Eurotrip.
Anyways I want to get drunk. But I don't like to drink alone. It's still early enough to say screw it though and drink anyways. I know it won't solve anything but I haven't been drunk since the incident where I thought she was moving out. (I thought I posted it but could not find it). I also want to smoke some of those cigarettes I found while hunting. I never did through them away. I could really use a Marlboro Light right now.
Anyways I'm going to sign off for the night. I feel like I'm whining to much here.
9 comments:
CH - Sorry you're in a funk over there! Hope you stayed away from the smokes. Surgeon General says they're a bad idea! ;)
Keep your head up!
**That music video you got there is freakin' me out!**
O272, Sorry if I'm freakin you out with the video. I have a crush on the singer. She's freakin hot. I've been tryin to keep most of the videos tame. I doubt most of the people reading would like what I really listen to. :)
I've stayed away from the smokes so far. Feeling a little better today. But nookie has a way of doing that. ;-)
CH
Glad you found a way to cheer you up -- I was just going to suggest taking Summer and going out on a date or something, but "nookie" can do just as well!
By the way, I thought Eurotrip was absolutely hilarious. Matt Damon singing that "Scotty Doesn't Know" song... that was stuck in my head for days.
That song is still in my head! After I was done posting I was able to pay more attention to the movie. It actually was pretty funny. I just couldn't get into it as much trying to post at the same time.
A date would be nice. Now if only Summer would agree. :~p
CH
Could the word you're looking for be "restless"?
Shades of Woe, That could be the word I'm looking for. But it might be more than just restless. In a way it is restlessness (?) but it's also more. I feel restless and frustrated. All sorts of different things.
CH
Hey, sorry to hear about your funk, (that's a great word for it btw). I hate drinking alone too, but lately I haven't let that stop me. A little "nookie" never hurts either, in fact science has proven that it helps (release of endorphines and all that), but it's not a long term cure. You're doing the right thing seeing a counselor and maybe getting on some medicine. I know we all keep telling you this but, hang in there.
Michael
absolutely love the video!
I know how it feels to be in a funk, too...let me know if you find a way out of it...;)
wOW! I've got some new readers. It still excites me to get new readers and commentors.
April, if I find a way out I'll let you know. And thanks fopr liking the video. Isn't Amy Lee hot?!
sealed lips, I tried to check out your site and profile but the computer wouldnt let me. But feel free to add me to your list.
Summer is actually up for a date night with me if we can find a sitter and afford to do something. (More on that later though.)
10 more days till I see the doc.
CH
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