More crap I don't need right now

**New post below this one as well.**


Well yesterday wasn't all sunrises and roses. No. Not by a long shot.

Apparently my mom has been "unhappy" with how things in her life have been going. So she decided to attand a seminar in San Francisco. This was a 3 day seminar having to do with becoming the "you that you always wanted to be". Or something like that. I'm not exactly sure. After I got a bombshell or two dropped on me I was in a different world.

Anyways part of this program is about open and honest communication. Because before you can be the you that you want to be, you have to be open and honest in all of your life. Which means that you must always be honest with the people in your life. So she spent most of her breaks in the day practicing this open and honest communication. And guess who was on that list.




That's right. Yours truly. Me.

So she tells me that in order for her to be who she wants to be she needs to be open and honest with me. So what does she do? She tells me that there has been something that has been bothering her for a quite a few years now. She tells me that she knows I did something when I was a kid. About the same time my sister and I were molested by my cousin. She says that she is my mother and that she still loves me unconditionally. She don't expect me to do or say anything. But that she needed to get it off her chest to become this new person.

Well there wasn't really much I could say. She just comes out of the blue and says I did something over 20 years ago and she knows I did it. WTF?! I have a hard enough time remembering things that happened last week. How the hell am I supposed to remember every detail about what happened in the year 1980 something? That is a year that I don't want to remember anything about. So I said well I have no clue what your talking about or what I'm supposed to say so I'm just not going to say anything.

To make me feel like I wasn't alone she says that well your not the only one I've taken by surprise today. I also called one of my brothers and blew him away as well by saying that I want to have more communication with him than just saying hi at the Christmas party every year.

Um...yeah. That's so the same thing. I feel ssoooooo much better now. Thanks for that little tid bit of information. Then she says to me that that was all she wanted to say to me and that she would let me go back to my evening with my family.

Yeah. Right. You just drop this major bombshell on me and I'm supposed to go on like nothing was ever said? Bull SHIT! So it pretty much fucked up the rest of my night. As well as today too. That's why I'm posting today in the afternoon. I was in a funk at work that I couldn't get out of so I came home. Didn't help. Funk is still there.

Back to the conversation now. I asked her before we hung up if this was something that she was doing with Mary Kay. She said no it was something she wanted to do on her own because she was unhappy with how her life was going. This is when she drops the other bombshell. She's going to use her newly found "open and honest communication" skills when she gets home and talk to my dad. And she's not sure if they will remain married when they are done "talking".

Um....nice one mom. Especially since you just had hoim buy you a new wedding ring not even 4 months ago that he paid 3 grand for. Way to go. Smooth move.

So here we are.6 days before Christmas, and two major life altering things being said to me. Out of nowhere. Merry f'ing Christmas.

This really isn't the shit that I need to be dealing with. Not now. Not ever for that matter. I'm just starting to get my own life on track for once and in the blink of an eye my mom goes and derails it again. Where the hell does she get off tearing my life apart just to improve her own life?

So really all I have to say now is that you can't expect to give "open and honest communication" without receiving "open and honest communication" in return. Be carefuly waht you ask for. You just might get what you are asking for. And when you get it, it might not be as pleasant as you think it will be.

All this is really starting to make me think that what I hear some people say is correct. "A parents job is to raise their children to the age of 18. To ensure that they will be contributing members of society. Once the child reaches the age of 18 the parents job is done. In return when the child get's married and starts his own family the parents are no longer the most important people in the childs life. That roll goes to the spouse and children of the child. You should not worry about making your parents happy anymore. Make you spouse and yourself happy. Every one else is secondary and not as important anymore." That is not an exact quote but real close. It stems from people that are sacrificeing their marriage to please their parents. The parents have done their job. It's time to go out and live your own life the way you see fit.

Really begining to think that nature has it right when the offspring leave the nest and never return.