So how was everyone's Valentines Day? Mine wasn't to good. I think that I'm pretty much done with it for good. No more presents, cards, flowers, or any of that other crappy bull shit.
I was SO excited about V-day while I was at work today. I couldn't wait to come home and give Summer her present. I was so excited that I almost gave it to her last night.
What a waste of anticipation that turned out to be.
So what did I give the love of my life? The woman that means everything to me and gives my life meaning. I bought her a diamond bridal set. Nothing fancy as I could not afford a nice engagement ring and wedding band like I bought her over 12 years ago. But I got her what I could pay cash for. It was a diamond engagement ring with 4 diamonds channeled in it and a wedding band that has about 6 diamonds channeled in it.
While I was at work I bought her 3 roses. Came home and got her card out of hiding, put the rings in the stuffed animal that I got to hide it in, and presented everything to her.
How did she react you might ask? Well I'll tell you. She got MAD at me. She got mad at me for spending the money. Mad at me because she didn't get me a v-day gift. Mad because I bought her a wedding ring. (Which she new that I wanted to get for her for the last 5 years since her original disappeared.)
I don't care that she didn't get me a v-day gift. That's fine. She did get me a b-day gift. It just won't be here until Fri. sometime. We had the money to spend. Our credit cards are paid off. I did not charge it. I paid CASH!
I did not buy it for her to get sex from her.
I did not buy it to get a gift in return from her.
I did not buy it because I felt obligated to.
I bought it simply for the reason that I love her.
I bought it because to me wedding ring is an important part of marriage. I'm not sure why but it is. It may go back to what FTN had to say in his post today. My grandfather died of alzheimers in 1983. To this day my Grandmother still wears her wedding ring. Because it is a huge part of marriage and love.
So now that I have given her her gift we have hardly spoken to each other the rest of the day. I got home from work at 3:30. It's now after 9:00 and we have spoken maybe 20 words to each other.
She tells me that she loves me.
In my head I say how? How can you love me and not want to wear a wedding ring?
She just looks at me and says nothing. When she did speak to me an hour ago it was with a rotten tone of voice biting my head off for nothing.
So now I don't know what to think. Does she really love me? Should I take the ring back to the store? How damn embarrassing is that going to be? Should I just let it sit in a drawer and collect dust? Or should I take this as a sign that she don't love me, and don't want to be married to me?
I just feel like shit right now. I'm sick to my stomach. I hurt.
So this is why next year and all years to follow I'm just going to say FUCK YOU to Valentines Day. It's not worth the trouble or heartache.
6 comments:
All I wanted, for the longest time was for you to love me for who I've become not for who I'm not. I'm NOT just a pretty face, I'm the woman with a hart. I'm the one who gets up with the kid who is having trouble sleeping I'm the one who joked about one kid getting sick, I'm the sister of two siblings. A card and flowers are always welcomed I don't care for jewelery or any sleezy outfit for the bedroom I don't care for those. All I ever cared for was for you to realize that I'm the one who loves you. I'm sorry that I hurt you yesterday I just hoped you would ask what I really wanted for vday instead of wondering oh well she'll like it or half thinking what does she really want. All I care about is our two sons that love me and love you they just wish they knew how much they mean to you. I barely see you hug our oldest and it pains him and me too I try to hug him when he's here it's not easy when I'm not up early enough just to spend a few moments with him instead I'm in bed with until 6:30 then I'm rushing around giving meds and watching our oldest walk out the door without a hug that what kills me right there.
Oh...I hurt for you both. (((HUGS)))
Damn CH...I'm really sorry to hear that. I can't even think of anything else to say. Good luck to you in figuring this out.
My God that's sad. I hope things got better after this post. They sure as hell couldn't have gotten worse.
Not really sure what to say.{pause~~~awkward moment~~~)
I hope you two have talked this out in the past couple of days.
Michael
Wow, I have been reading through the archives, so super late to comment here...
But good grief...how totally selfish and ungrateful could she be???!!!
I am not a jewerly fan myself, but it gives my husband a LOT of pleasure to buy it for me. I take it graciously and in the manner in which it was intended.
All I can say to Summer is GROW UP.
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