A sinking feeling

The last 24 hours have been VERY eventful to say the least. I took youngest to see his therapist again yesterday morning. He looked through all of our IEP paperwork (SR keeps every IEP form we get in a binder with page protectors) and he noticed something neither one of us ever did. Back in Sept. when we had an IEP for him the first week of school we had talked about sending him to a non public school. The Spe. Ed diecrtor for the district even called the school during the meeting. Yet there was no documentation saying that we even discussed the school. So now legally the conversation never took place. Great. There is more tom say about that but my mind is racing right now.

Last night while I was at work Youngest asked if he could go play with the neighbor girl (his best friend). So Summer said sure. Next thing she knows the police dept. calls up and says that they have him in there custody and he tried to break into the hardware store ion town! They are going to bring him home. She calls me and I get off work and come home. By the time I get here they have dropped him off and have left. SR's friend from church and a teacher at the school is here. We talk about everything that has happened with him lately and all the crap that we have gone through with the school.

Cut to today. I wake up early and call the Schools Superintendants office. Leave a message for them to call me back. Then I call the Spec e director and leave a message for her to call me back. Then call Kaiser and get transfered to the crisis center at Kaiser. They get all the info from me and say they are going to talk to the head of child psychiatry tyhere and get back to me within an hour. They PROMISE!

After all the phone calls I write an email to the spec ed person and CC it to the superintendant. asst. superintendant and the Protection and Advocasy Inc. (PAI) in Sacramento. which by the way Summer called them last night and they put us on the top of there list and are having an atorney call us on Mon. moprning. YAY!

Any ways that was 2 hours ago. Still no calls from the school dist. even though I gave them my cel and home number. I did receive an email from PAI saying that they received it and for us to call and they will set us up with someone. That was already done though.

So let's go back in time to Kaiser. They called me back in 20 minutes. Amazing! I wasn't expecting that. They said to have him in tyhe office at 1:30 this afternoon. They are also checking an a residential program for him and will have more info on that when we get there this afternoon. I never even mentioned that to the crisis person. They are finally seeing that as a necessity just like we are. I mean it's to the point where we can't even go to the bathroom when we are alone with him.

So Summer is getting off work early today and is going to meet us for the appointment. (My typing is zattrocious today!!)

Anyways now I'm just overwheled with so much right now. I mean we are finally going to get some real help. Hopefully. Kaiswer is seeing that we need to have him in a place where they can better evaluate him. That is making me so happy. But at the same time I'm scared. I'm sad. I feel empty inside. I want to scream. I just want to feel numb to the world. I just don't know what to do. Or how I should be feeling right now.

I know there is no set way to feel. I also know that this is a good thing for him and for the family as a whole. This is the right thing to do. But why does it have to be so hard? Why does it have to hurt so much? Why did it even have to get to this pooint in the first place? This is NOT WHAT WE WNATED AT ALL FOR OUR CHILDREN!!!!!!

I am just so full of conflicting emotions right now. But anger and pure rage is the most prevalent. I just don't know who I'm rtaging and angry with.

I have so much more I want to say but I just can not sort pout my feelings. It is also time ofor us to leave. Youngest and I are going to meet Summer for lunch before the appointment. this may be the last time for awhile. That saddens me the most.